Movin' on up

First things first, I'd like to say that I accomplished all things off of my list the other day.

My new juicer is AWESOME! Just a lot of pain to clean up, but so delicious. I've been making carrot apple ginger, and watering it down with some celery and romaine. Mmmmm so delicious! I tried to juice some spinach, and it didn't work. I'm gonna try kale because I've heard of that more often... maybe it will be easier.

I self-practiced yoga for 45 minutes out on my pool patio. I have never actually done such a long self-practice and I am so proud of myself for pushing through! I sort of just went off of what I remembered from some of my recent yoga classes - I know I've taken enough I should be able to lead myself, but it is really hard to do without a lead. I really concentrated though and it was actually easier than I expected - it was all about the focus. I was surprised as well, I found myself erring away from sun salutations (though in the past I've thought that was really the crux of the yoga practice) and incorporating other sorts of asanas. Today I'm pretty sore, as well, so I know I did a good job!

It felt awesome to get back into a practice, and ideally I'd like to form a habit of practicing every morning. Also I'd love to finally incorporate meditation into my regular life as well - though I do find that incredibly difficult. Something to work on.

There was this great article linked on Ridiculously Extraordinary - 7 Reasons Why I Do It Everyday - very inspirational for beginning to do things. Very important.

I'm finding my motivation has skyrocketed since I created that list, then accomplished the things. I am not a regular lister, but when I do list things it changes my perspective completely. I've found recently when I am really overwhelmed with things to do, if I just write them down, I realize it really isn't that much. And this list worked to motivate me as well. And I've always been a "to do" lister when it came to chores or errands or schoolwork. Just takes a little push.

Also motivating me today was just the fact that I got up and got ready and went to work and came home. That was a great feeling, as silly as it sounds it is nice to just realize that I am capable of that and it is something I, as a human, can do. And will do, on a regular basis, eventually.

Even though today was a little bit lame. I mean it wasn't bad, and in actuality it was really easy - 6.5 hours of work - the shortest day of paid work I've had since my bullshit jobs in high school - and a full day of pay, tedious but not physically taxing work that just needed to be done. But I could sense this attitude in the office that was really turning me off - I think it was pretty typical, show is ending and we're burnt out, attitude but it was really irking me. No one was too friendly to me (not unfriendly, just not overly friendly) and I witnessed too many tense discussions.

At the same time, I got a bit wistful about production. And I started beating myself up about closing doors. But then I changed my mind when there was an argument about box cost and two different sets of bosses butting heads. What an inefficient system.

And the thing was, it was really nice to not be a PA, but we had to rely on the PAs and the regular office staff for everything, which I found frustrating. And from what the girl I was working with was telling me, being a Producers Assistant isn't all that great either.

So I think leaving production behind is the right decision, though I'm not entirely ruling it out for the next couple of months. Eventual leave behind for good - yes. Right now, when I'm desperate for a job? We'll see.

I actually used this motivation to rework my resume in a way I feel really good about, and then I fired off two great cover letters to two positions I think I'd be happy to have. And sent my resume to one of the guys I worked with today.

September is coming, and according to some people who think they know what they're talking about slash are trying to make me feel better, that's hiring season. Or at least more hiring season than August - so I'm crossing my fingers, keeping the faith up.

I think I gotta force myself into a routine - this was said to me before but I sort of ignored the advice - in order to stay positive and motivated. It's the waking up and doing that gets me revved up, rather than the sleeping in and relaxing. I can relax later on in the days, do stuff earlier in the morning.

I think this will be my new goal starting Saturday - set up a routine and stick to it. I imagine that's the only thing that will get me through until a job comes along! And I feel like it will come along soon.